Hating February

[muck_a_luck]

The year before I was pregnant with Little Sister - so that would be early 2005 - I had my worst ever experience with seasonal affective disorder.

I have always been a little down in January and February. But that winter was a doozy. I looked back on it and thought, wow. So that's what it's like to be depressed. When I described the experience to my GP in April, she suggested I take a vacation during that time of year to someplace warm and sunny. *rolls eyes*

Last year, I had Little Sister growing inside me, and hormones had me so upside down and backwards mood-wise that I couldn't tell if winter had any effect on me.

But it's definitely hitting hard this year. I just realized it last night. AG33 did one of his most frustrating things he does, and I grimly put him to bed and came downstairs and had a meltdown. It didn't help that when I was finally ready to lay down and sleep, Little Sister decided it was time to wake up and refuse to go back to sleep.

Anyway, after sleeping, I am feeling much better this morning. But I'm guessing it'll be another couple of weeks of this at least.

I hate February.

In weather news, it is currently icking outside. We will be having freezing rain and various kinds of ick for the next 24 hours or so. I got the groceries yesterday along with the rest of the panickers and am now very happy I did. No obligations beyond my front door today. Hope to wash the children, clean a few bathrooms.

Feeling a little anticipatory stress because school will probably be delayed tomorrow. And then Tuesday, I need to stay and meet the sofa delivery people. So likely I will be late for work two days this week. It doesn't help my mental health to feel like I'll never get on top of my pile of work to do at the office.

And finally, it amuses me greatly that I have a brand new stress dream. I have been dreaming it almost every night. It has to do with trying to drive in ice and snow to get Little Sister to some important destination. February 15, 2007. The beginning of a phobia.

Comments

[yeesalu.livejournal.com]

I don't know much about this, but I think there is some kind of a special light you can use to help you cope with seasonal affective disorder. It's supposed to simulate sunlight and help your body cope with winter. I've never tried this, but used to work with someone who found it really helped. There's probably information about this if you google it.

Hang in there - February is almost over!

[princessofg.livejournal.com]

i am totally having the same thing. i know better; i know to get outdoors; i did it to myself.

awful. just awful. and yeah, like you, february is the worst.

hang in there and i will too.

*links arms*

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

It's hard to get out in the winter. Did you see alpha_strike's comment to this post about lightbulbs?

[princessofg.livejournal.com]

yes; she's right. they're real and they work.

[alpha-strike.livejournal.com]

Let there be light.

If the radiance of a thousand suns
were to burst into the sky,
that would be like
the splendor of the Mighty One—
I am become Death, the shatterer of Worlds

Ok, so maybe quoting Oppenheimer quoting the Bhagavad Gita isn't really appropriate, but I've always liked that bit. And you probably don't need nuclear-blast quality light in your home. Although, thinking about it, I once thought somebody did, or I wouldn't have been a rocket scientist. Back to the subject:

Drag yourself out of you dreary home and to the store. Throw away all those GE soft white light-bulbs and replace them with GE Reveal, Sylvania Daylight, or the one Phillips makes, which I can't recall. The difference they make is astonishing. Really.

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

We have the weirdest lighting ever in this place. Very few normal light bulbs. But something to consider for next year - maybe collect a few lights so I can use a few normal lightbulbs. Or superduper ones. :)

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

There is a reason I live where I do. Ice? Snow? Short, short days? I can't do it. My first winter in San Francisco it was cloudy/rainy every day for an entire month, and I was in a complete tailspin by the end of the month. Fortunately that was an anomalous weather pattern.

Get one of those full-spectrum lights, really.

It has to do with trying to drive in ice and snow to get Little Sister to some important destination.

I have that as a waking stress dream every time you post about going out to drive to daycare/work during ice storms. Stop it! ;-)

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

I went out today, but the roads were fine.

I didn't tell you in advance. See how good I was! :)

[starting-gate.livejournal.com]

I hate February. *nods head*

Don't know if you ever found where this icon came from, but here's the episode and screencap: Chimera at jd_daily

*hugs*

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :D