muck_a_luck | Entries tagged with brainstorm

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags

I think I'm willing to go out on a limb, here, people and declare that we have kicking! :) I hope this one kicks as much as Small Boy did. It was very reassuring. The doctors give you a standard to monitor for. I believe it was something like at least 10 kicks in half an hour, or something like that, and you were supposed to try to think of doing that a couple of times a day. Whenever I thought of it, Small Boy would always rise to the occassion and give me the necessary number of kicks within about two minutes.

One of the most fun things about pregnancy is the kicking. I liked when people could actually feel the kicking from the outside. I also thought it was cool when you could *see* it.

In other pregnancy news, however, I am tired of being moody all the time. Angry on Tuesday, giddy yesterday, glum today...

Stupidpregnancystupid.

I came stomping in from the grocery store, feeling ick and generally hateful. When I changed the paper towel roll, Husband was just walking through the kitchen. I said, "Stupid baby, making me feel sick!" He said, "Don't say that!" Then I proceeded to hit my tummy with the empty paper towel roll! He goes, "HEY! Don't be mean to the baby!" sounding outraged but cracking up. I proceeded to glare at all and sundry.

Icky, icky, ick today. Also, I think I may be getting either a lovely head cold or else the pregnancy hay fever. That would be lovely. It's a long damn way to May.

On top of that, last night, the pair of jeans I have been wearing this week got soda dumped on it, so I was going to put on a fresh pair, and of course, they don't fit anymore. *growls* I tossed all my larger ones when these became swimmingly huge on me last winter. Now I wish I'd kept them. Damn 20/20 hindsight. So now, for casual clothes, I am stuck with pregnancy stuff. Work clothes are a bit more forgiving, but I'm giving them two more weeks, tops. I am very displeased to be wearing pregnancy clothes at this point. I have an extrememly limited wardrobe for being pregnant. I am by no means a clothes horse, but I am going to be thorougly sick of these things by May. Not to mention that of course, THEY don't really fit either, yet. *growls more*

On the upside, I was going through the pregnancy drawer today, and I had forgotten just how cute all my little outfits were. Mom and I did a great job shopping.

So off to go be more icky, icky, ick.

WARNING: Beware massive SG-1 spoilers in the comments. (Look. I am a creature of fandom. And so are you, probably, one way or another, if you are reading this journal!)

( I promised certain parties I would always cut for TMI, and I presume any post involving probes and pee is probably TMI... )

Anyway, the yard monkey looks good, though there's still bloodwork to wait for. That should get us moved along past the concern about down's syndrome. Then I'll spaz around worring about the FNP test in December, then I plan to quit worrying.

And now, off to put the Small Boy to bed.

I have commented to a few of you over the last few weeks that I have been having a "health issue."

In fact, I am just about to start the second trimester of my third pregnancy.

The very small backstory. Pregnancy one was a miscarriage. Pregnancy two was Small Boy, approximately 7.5 years ago.

I have to say, this baby has been wiping the floor with me.

Small Boy was ridiculously easy. I clearly remember being pretty queasy with him - for exactly two days. Then the worst symptom was migraine headaches, which went away as soon as I broke down and actually took Tylenol, followed by leg cramps, which I learned to dectect as they were starting. All I had to do to stop them was flex my foot and go back to sleep.

But this one. I am just starting to feel remotely human again after approximately two months of just feeling ill. Not throwning up, or anything, but just constantly queasy, like I could throw up at any moment. Very unpleasant. I am happy to report that for about three days now, I have only had isolated twinges of nausea. I am hoping this is a good sign and that as I enter the second trimester, it really will just go the fuck away!

As bad as the nausea, I have been completely and utterly exhausted. I have been working my normal 40 hour week. I get home, and I feel like I'm going to die. I'm sound sensitive, queasy, and practically panting just from trying to walk around. Some evenings have been worse than others, but it's been ugly. On the weekends, I go to bed a 9pm on Friday night, sleep to 7:30, get up, feed Small Boy, do a couple of things around the house, and by 11am am ready for my three-hour nap.

Cellmate points out that she had a similar experience. Not tired with first child, exhausted with second. We posit that this may be just the nautral mommy workload catching up with you. On a weeknight, when Husband goes to bed early, I don't like to go to bed before I *know* Small Boy is asleep. Even if I'm really good, and go to bed as soon as that happens, the earliest I can usually get to bed is 9:30. I also like to be up and dressed before Small Boy wakes up. To be sure of this, I need to hit the shower by 6am. Back before Small Boy, I could drop in bed at 8 if I wanted to, and didn't have to roll out til 7am. That's a huge difference in sleeping patterns.

So anyway, still not bouncing, but hopefully the second trimester will look up. You really do get a lot of your energy back then. Crossing my fingers.

I'm due in mid to late May.

I should also say that Small Boy and Husband are both compeltely elated, and they have been great. Small Boy kisses the baby goodnight every night. Husband has been so good about helping me and giving me space to be miserable and to sleep.

I should also say that we are incredibly paranoid and gunshy about pregnancy. Prior to this post, the number of people outside our house who knew was about ten. I am technically of "advanced maternal age," which means I will be having an amnio, and this is considered a high risk pregnancy. I have actually already had TWO ultrasounds, because I had some bleeding in the early weeks. I'm actually feeling very not sure about posting yet, before we get the amnio results, but Husband has finally told his colleagues at the office and Cellmate is DYING for me to tell people here. (I had to tell her. When I started drinking milk in the office and being gone for weird doctor visits, I was going to have to either start telling gigantic lies or just let her in on the secret.) Anyway, anything horrible happens, and you'll certainly see it here.

All that said, I'd like to extend apologies for my distance these last few weeks. I limp through my friends page, read without commenting, can't face anything too complicated, have trouble getting up the energy for replies to comments. I've been generally wallowing in my misery and too tired for words. I'm hoping I'll be my normal self soon, but I intend to blame everything weird and anti-social about myself on being pregnant for about another 8 months (got the post partum thing going on and all...).

And now I feel like I need a pregnancy icon. Maybe I can scan in a picture of my huge belly from right before Small Boy was born. Oh! Or maybe the picture of him when he just came out! All red, wrinkly and slimy! :p Anyway, with all the whining, I feel the attached is moderately appropriate.

So, Small Boy has taken to kissing the baby goodnight.

Wednesday, the day I had my follow-up sonogram, I happened to know exactly how big the baby was. 1.7 cm. So he kissed the baby and I said, "Small Boy, the baby is THIS big!!!"

He said, "That doesn't mean we don't need to love it!"

We were reassured enough by the sonogram that we decided to tell Small Boy about Brainstorm.

He was VERY excited.

Though he did ask me how long the baby would be the center of attention. I told him that babies take a lot of work and attention, but that he was old enough that I thought he would be able to help a lot and that we could make the baby a team effort. Also, that although babies take a lot of work and attention, they give a lot back. They love you and love to be played with and talked to and that makes up for a lot of the work.

He said that yesterday he kept telling people that he couldn't wait until May (estimated due date is May 17), but he wouldn't tell them why, because he didn't want to get their hopes up. I did explain to him, briefly, that I was preganant before him and that something went wrong and that baby was not born. I explained that we were pretty sure that this baby was healthy, but that we all had to be aware that especially this early, lots of things could still happen.

Apparently, when told by Small Boy that he didn't want to get her hopes up, his friend Z said, "I never get my hopes up!" Small Boy was still not persuaded to tell his secret! :) I told him he would not have to keep it secret all the way til May, but that I appreciated him not saying anything for a while longer.

This is going to be fun, isn't it? :)

Had very minor spotting this morning, but my handout from the OB/GYN yesterday said have the doctor paged for any vaginal bleeding.

Doc said, have a sonogram today.

You will be excited to know that for an abdomonal ultrasound, the patient must have a "full bladder."

My appointment was at 11:30. The nurse told me to "empty my bladder" at 10:30, then to drink 16 oz of water before the appointment time and to take 16 oz of water with me to sip while I waited. She said I was a work-in appointment, so I was likely to have to wait. (I don't know if they told me this specially. Do they have my chart marked "patient is time sensitive" now?)

First, I must say how difficult it was for me not to absent-mindedly "empty my bladder" once I started to need to pee. As in, need to pee, go to the bathroom and pee. I kept having to tell myself, no! No peeing! And this was before I left.

So I got to the hospital, and my appointment was not actually til noon. You get there 30 minutes early so you can go through the hospital admissions process. By the time I was done with being admitted, I *really* needed to pee. As in, if you were driving, a woman *might* consider just pulling over and peeing in the bushes. I know that doesn't sound that desparate to a guy, but if a chick is willing to pee in the woods, you *know* she's got to pee.

And, of course, while the patient is in this state of desparately needing to pee, the ultrasound technician is prodding your abdomen with ultrasound equipment. REALLY REALLY HARD!!!!

Though I must say, she was VERY impressed with how full my bladder was.

I had both an external and internal ultrasound. For an internal ultrasound (yes) they insert the (yes) probe in the vagina. She joked that when she explains how the internal ultrasound is going to work, as she is finishing up the external exam, most patients say, "I don't care what you do to me next, just let me pee!"

I told her she must be the most hated and loved doctor in the hospital. On the one hand, she tortures everyone with the full bladder. On the other hand, "Oh my God! She let me pee!"

Very, very undignified process. And we haven't even (and will not) discussed the probe...

Also, the "ultrasound transmission gel" was in a warmer and was not cold, but surprisingly hot. I was braced for cold. The hot gel on my tummy almost made me pee right there. Though at that point, to be fair, almost any random event could have made me pee, so....

The end result is that this morning's minor bleeding probably had to do with the development of the placenta. Apparently, the placenta puts out "roots." If one of these roots encounters a blood vessel, the vessel can break and there can be minor bleeding. Apparently I do have a very small one of these events going on and that is probably what caused the spotting. It is "self correcting." I have yet to speak to the doctor, but the nurse said that typically they would do some follow up bloodwork and a follow up ultrasound in a couple of weeks, but that it looks like everything is normal.

According to the (yes) yolk sac, I am 5 weeks, 3 days pregnant. They could not find a fetal heartbeat today, but that is nothing to be alarmed about. The doc said this morning that if I really was six weeks pregnant, they *probably* would see a heartbeat.

And that is all.

I'm sure you have both had preggers friends before, but as I was saying to Uisgich via AIM this morning, I have no modesty left after the last pregnancy. You are likely to hear gruesome, gruesome things from me... :)

Will edit this if the doc has anything to say.

E-mail exchange with Husband...
-----Original Message-----
From: CK
Sent: Thursday, September 15, 2005 2:07 PM
To: HUSBAND
Subject: I don't know if it is my imagination

I don't know if it is my imagination, but I'm all weird and lightheaded. Feels like huger. I'm gonna raid some quarters from the car and go next door for a pint of milk and a twix.

That's something else I need to do. Drink more milk. 4 glasses a day.

8 glasses a day water

5 fruits and veggies a day (I'm counting morning glass of OJ as one).

Reduce caffiene to minimal.

I think I want to bring a gallon of milk to work with me to have with modest chocolatey snacks in the mid day.

I could stand to increase whole grains, too.

Stupid diet...

Paralegal/Office Manager
blah, blah, blah

Subject: RE: I don't know if it is my imagination
Date: Thu, 15 Sep 2005 14:08:16 -0400
From: HUSBAND
To: CK
X-OriginalArrivalTime: 15 Sep 2005 18:08:06.0526 (UTC)

A gallon of milk, a pile a fruit, a pyrimid of water and a bunch of Twix, no one is going to suspect a thing.

tof

I am pregnant again, apparently.

I went to the doctor a week ago and was one day late. Urine test was negative. Doc wants me to get a mammogram, but apparently not if I'm pregnant. So she says, if you don't get your period in one week, come back for a blood test.

Well, I have been feeling weird ever since. Funny little pains in my low back and abdomen. But my brain has twice in the past decided I must be pregnant and I have manifested mild symptoms of pregnancy, including late periods, so I figured it was my brain playing tricks on me.

But with my period nearly a week late, yesterday I caved and bough another urine test. This one was very obviously positive.

Small Boy couldn't figure out what I was up to. I used one of his plastic restaurant cups to pee into. He wanted to know what I was going to do with it, so I jokingly told him. He also wanted to know what the pregnancy test thing was and I told him to eat his breakfast. Later, he saw the test in the bathroom.

He said, "What's that stick thing?"

I said, "That stick thing is none of your business yet?"

He said, "When will it be my business?"

I was actually ready to tell him yesterday morning, but Husband and I agreed that we would talk about the best time. Husband is worried that Small Boy will be upset if he knows about it, then I miscarry early, like my first pregnancy. In a way, I think it would be good to explain to him what is going on, becuase if I do miscarry, he will certainly know that something is seriously wrong with me. But I suppose that he doesn't need to know in advance.

No major symptoms yet. Just the sort of weird twinges. I would think they were my imagination except that yesterday I was all weird and burpy for no reason. So stuff is going on down there. But no nausea, no headaches, no hay fever, no excessive tiredness. At least not yet.

And that, my dears, is my 2000th post! :) I was wondering what I was going ot do about it!