I finally saw Revenge of the Sith

[muck_a_luck]

So, I finally saw Sith, because I was a good Mommy and Small Boy wanted to see it, and there was no way he could watch it all alone.

It was better than expected.

Partitially because there were very, very few scenes tht called on the actors to, you know, act.

The special effects were gorgeous and breathtaking, of course. But perhaps this was a classic situation of "must see on the big screen" because watching it at home, I felt a lot like I was watching someone else play a really awesome video game. It was kinda cool to watch, but also kinda pointless and very hollow. This was particularly true of the big starship battle at the very beginning.

I should also say that the one thing that has been good and right about these movies was strongly represented here. That initial scene in Phantom Menance, where young Obi-Wan and his master fight together against impossible odds and take out a whole starship full of troops and droids with perfect swordplay and teamwork. That was an awesome scene. And there's lots and lots of that in this one - Anakin and Obi-Wan fighting first side by side, then against each other. More beautiful special effects, but more human and to me, more fun to watch.

On to my problems with it.

Any scene involving acting was hideous.



And it stretches suspension of disbelief to the absolute breaking point to believe that the Jedi would have allowed a guy a completely mentally deficient as Anakin to hang around. I know he was supposed to be "the chosen one," but my LORD the boy is dumber than dirt. Dumb. All your life you learn the Dark Side is bad, the Dark Side is evil, the Dark Side blah, blah, and then you meet a guy who says, oh, the Dark Side isn't really that bad, even though I just used it and became a hideous monster and destroyed one of your most respected mentors, but really, come on, give it a try, it has a lot to offer... Give me a freakin break! They should have tossed this guy out of the gene pool...

Obi-Wan really drops the ball on the whole thing at the end. Cannot believe he didn't take some measures to protect Padme from his deception. She's down there, trying to persuade Anakin to turn away from the Dark Side, and then Obi-Wan ambushes her, and doesn't leap down to protect her, or anything, just lets Anakin think she betrayed him. What a jackass.

I don't get what's up with the Jedi, either. They have these super abilities to "use their feelings" yet NONE of them had a clue what was up with Anakin. Small Boy points out that Anakin is strong with the force. Maybe that makes him hard to spy on.

I don't get the Jedi at all. I mean, sometimes they rip pieces off buildings and fling them at each other. So why didn't Obi-Wan just wave his hand at General Grevious and the stupid droid just smashed against a wall, or all his bolts fell out or something. Grevious wasn't any more animate than the x-wing Yoda lifts out of the swamp. Though Grevious states that he has been trained in the ways of the Force. Dude. I wish my toaster had the Force, then... I also don't get why so many Jedi fall off cliffs. They can at many times fly through the air with either the use of the force or their superior acrobatic training. Fly, leap, flip, turn. And yet, I think at least four different key Jedi/Sith characters fall off cliffs in this thing. Can't they just levitate themselves? Either back up to the top of the cliff, or slowly and calmly to the ground. *peers at canon*

And finally, I'm right there with you, dork_elf, on the kill shot. If I saw somebody obviously dying, and their legs were getting burned off by a lava flow, and they were catching on fire and burning to death, you know, I think I'd step in and take action. Me. Personally. Not just a hypothetical me. Obi-Wan wasn't dashing off to call the special Jedi Burn Center Medical Team, or anything. He was just leaving him to die anyway. He could have pithed him good with his light saber and been done with it.

So, all in all, though better than expected due to the lack of need for any acting, I still am annoyed.

I'm annoyed because these movies are junk. Not the absolute worst junk, but pretty damn stupid. They continue to earn money at least partially based on the hope that Lucas will someday produce something as good as the first two movies, but honestly, does anybody think Lucas really has anything left in him besides special effects? It bugs me that he continues to earn a gazillion dollars because he was good once upon a time. Though I suppose I should be fair. I'm sure there are plenty of new kids in the audience, like Small Boy. But Small Boy would never have seen these damn things if it weren't for my brother, who's living in the past.

Comments

[uisgich.livejournal.com]

Very entertaining review and you made a lot of valid and amusing points.

Dude. I wish my toaster had the Force, then...

*giggles madly*

[brainofck.livejournal.com]

*snert*

Our poor brothers...

[kalliopeia.livejournal.com]

It bothered me that Obi-Wan left Anakin there to die in such horrible pain, not really because that would have saved a lot of trouble later on, but mostly because he's spent how many years being this person's mentor? And he's just leaving him there to suffer? That was awful. But other than that, I thought that scene was really the only powerful scene character wise in the entire movie. The acting was generally bad but I thought Ewan pulled it off there. This has nothing to do with my eternal devotion to Ewan, of course. :)

I grew up utterly devoted to Star Wars, so right about the time that they started killing the Jedi, I was a goner. I liked the first movie despite it's flaws. The second was just bad. But at that moment in the third, suddenly everything connected with the original trilogy and I just cried and cried. I was weepy from that moment on, even on the way home. There were a few moments that just killed me, one being Anakin taking his first breath as Darth Vader. Gah, such chills.

I tell you what bothered me though. Padme! WTF? She was like, warrior queen in the first movie, and she even had some attitude left in the second, but what the HELL? Where did all her spunk and attitude go? This weepy woman who does nothing but moon around after Anakin is NOT strong, sassy, smart and compassionate Leia's mother, dammit. It wouldn't have been so bad if she'd always been like that but she wasn't! I really thought that she would realize that Anakin was in trouble, hook up (in the crime fighting sense, heh) with Obi-Wan and go after him. Her character just pissed me off in this movie.
/rant

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

Padme! WTF?

I would say she was having twins and in the first trimester... *snickers* I'm blaming hormones, general exhaustion, and nausea.

Possibly Anakin's general lack of brain cells is catching, and that's waht happened both to her and to Obi-Wan.

I had Star Wars figures and ships and my brother and I played with them constantly for years. I SO identified with Leia as a little girl. Han Solo was my first on-screen crush.

But I have lost all my emotional connection to these movies. I think if there was any hope that I would care, I was so pissed off about the first two - the pathetic scripts and acting - that I just couldn't connect to whatever was still left in this one. It certainly didn't help that I had no respect whatsoever for Anakin. He had hardly any integrity to corrupt. Big shock he went over to the Dark Side.

I should say, though, I skipped the destruction of the Jedi temple, because I didn't want to have to worry about Small Boy watching a bunch of seven-year-olds get slaughtered by a big scary guy with a sword. But I doubt it was salvagable for me, even if I had seen that scene.

[kalliopeia.livejournal.com]

Oh by the way, the Jedi cannot fly. They can levitate objects and they probably use that ability to enhance their jumps and such, or cushion a long fall but they can't actually fly as far as I know. No, it doesn't make sense to me either. :)

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

So, you've got a pretty good two-handed grip on the side of the cliff. Why not give yourself a good, twisty push off the cliff with the Force and boom! You're on top again. Maybe not possible when you're hanging on by one Yoda claw, but still... *glares at stupid inconsistancies*

[mresundance.livejournal.com]

Dude only drove a plot hole the size of Texas through that story with the whole part about Padme croaking after her kids are born.

WTF?

In the canon, there's a very poignant scene where Leia DISTINCTLY tells Luke she remembers her mom. "Very beautiful and very sad". WTF. LUCAS. GRR.

Additionally, she was such a wasted oppertunity. Padme could've been such a cool supporting character. But no. She's just going to cry and be pretty and pregnant (which usually don't coincide . . .) She was like a baby vessel by the end! *flails and swears* GEORGE. Leia was cool. Padme started cool. WHY? WHY?!

Yes. Acting was horrid. It made Jesse cry. Especially when you saw a guy like Ewan McGregor or Samuel L. floundering with that muck. And the incessant action sequences, one on top of another? Ugh.

Won't even contemplate on all the inconsistencies of the Jedi shit. He was inconsistent in the first canon, but that was within reason. This was just. GAH.

And yet, somehow, I still got pretty caught up in the whole story.

[muck-a-luck.livejournal.com]

Arguably, Leia could be remembering her foster mother. Is it very, very clear. I can't remember now.

And since she was pretty and pregnant, I'd say *second* trimester, when you're all glowy and happy and healthy and not completely a bloated whale yet... :p

I am too bitter and jaded and whatnot to get caught up in the story anymore. But also have enough distance to know how happy I am for Star Wars and Empire and how it doesn't bother me so much that the other stuff is lame. It's more the sheer rampant exploitative commercialism of it that bugs me. I don't mind that so much with a quality product - sell me LOTR figures til the cows come home. But to see it done with a piece of crap like this just makes me sad.

[mresundance.livejournal.com]

I'd say *second* trimester, when you're all glowy and happy and healthy and not completely a bloated whale yet... :p

Perhaps. But she still pops 'em out all happy squiggly and functional in the end. And didn't even look that pregnant and bloaty.

I know it's not a flattering time in life to be preggers. Therefore, is it too much to ask that when there's a pregnant woman in a movie, she actually look pregnant? Like it looks like they gave her a dodgeball and shoved it down her dress. (Same thing happened with Lethal Weapon 4 and wosshername. She didn't look pregnant! And the actress actually said she didn't - that she bloated liek woah.)

It bothers me. Because it's like, oh gosh, let's not uglify the eye candy by making her look actually pregnant and bloaty. OMG! (That idea is so, SO wrong on so many levels . . .)

Only movie with a cool pregnant character I can think of off the top of my head is Frances McDormand's character in Fargo. She had morning sickness! She stuffed her face and was bloaty! And she still kicked ass!

The commericialization thing. Yeah. I get why it bugs you. It kind of bugs me too.

But the ick moments with Padme are my squick (outside of the horrible, horrible acting). Honestly. My inner femininazi wants to spork something.

[mresundance.livejournal.com]

Granted, some people don't go bloaty when they're pregnant.

I have yet to meet one of these, but I've *heard* they exist.

[amise.livejournal.com]

Still haven't seen it. There isn't a word to describe how very bitter I am over the last two pieces of crap. Deeply bitter. If I didn't have homework due in four hours, I'd give an in depth analysis of my bitterness.

In closing, Lucas is a whore.

[lucky-sometimes.livejournal.com]

Hmm, I don't think that was me who was troubled by him just walking away. I'm a mean bitch, I'd walk too. Also, I'm a softhearted bitch, so I'd have trouble finishing him off. See the dichotomy there?

My biggest problem with the whole stinkfest can be summed up in one line.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Jesus, what would ever make anyone think that was a powerful, poignant scene. Ya know?

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

*sigh* I love the original trilogy beyond reason. (The original original -- not with extra added crap.) I hated the first two of the "prequels" with the hatred of a thousand burning suns. I thought Sith was better than the first two, and brought the whole thing full circle, but still, bleh. It was better on the big screen, though it still took me 10 or 15 minutes to settle in and go with the cornball humor.

Like you said, the acting, oh god the acting! Aaaaargh! And these are good actors -- Lucas is just crap, especially at writing dialogue. (And also, WTF with the world's most uncomfortable nightgown with the giant beads? Ouch.)

So you had a thing about cliff falling. I noticed Lucas's fetish for amputation. Seriously, there were more arms and legs hacked off in Sith as in all the previous movies combined -- and there were a lot in the previous movies... It's like Lucas has a stump fetish. Eeew!